Valentine's Chinese NY

Time has past rather quickly this year and it's already that time of the year... when I find myself missing the life I once had in Singapore. Chinese New Year just never feels quite the same here, but then again, I'm not complaining. Looking back since the start of this year, I'm quite content with pretty much all aspects of life at the moment.

Throwback time!

This year's Valentine's Day wasn't spent alone, thanks HW (and KI) for keeping me company. Had a really nice breakfast at The Grounds of Alexandria. Their ricotta hotcake served in a cast iron skillet was amazing, and so was their coffee. Loved the company, loved the atmosphere, loved the food.

From baKEE

2015 of Monster-dough & Pie

2014 ended beautifully and 2015 started with live fireworks, a long trip home, and...

From fooood

... a visit to my all-time favourite location in Sydney- the shipwreck, before catching the first sunset of the year at Little Bay. I haven't been back to the shipwreck in over 2 years... maybe 3. Didn't manage to watch the sunrise because the trip home from watching the fireworks was so draining, I just had to go home and sleep.

Hiatus Haiku

My oven is dead.

I am sad- no cakes and bread.

Time for Ikea.

(hey, that took 1 minute! Give me a break~)

Strangers and Cheesecake

We meet people everyday. Strangers who might be passing by in a shopping mall, the driver in the car next to yours at the red lights, a greeting with a friend's friend. Many will simply slip by without notice. When Chance decides to stop and allow an encounter, with some, there is an automatic click, where one goes "ah, we can get along". Perhaps this is the all-elusive "spark" that some are looking for. Others, we are more cautious in approaching or getting close, though that can certainly change with time. Yet others, we will instinctively avoid or even have a mild dislike right from the start.

While I do not personally believe in phenomenons such as love at first sight (how do you even know it's love when you don't know anything about a person? Can one really understand their own feelings within a mere few seconds of first sighting? I think not..), our power of observation and intuition is something we rely on more heavily than we know. The way we've been brought up, our prejudice, our bias, our preferences are all attributes to how we deal with the situation where we meet someone for the first time. Feelings are not irrational, they can be explained- if one allows it to be explained, but often, Denial pays a visit and Logic is cast out.

We all start off as strangers at one point, and perhaps after a certain period of time of getting to know someone and becoming friends/partners, we become strangers once more, almost like an expiry date stamped onto a relationship. 

From baKEE

On Loop

It's almost 2am. I've been listening to a live recording of Isaac Stern's playing of a Mozart violin concerto on loop for the past hour, silently celebrating the life he had and remembering back to the day he passed away nearly a decade and a half ago. At around 4 minutes, a distinctive sneeze is heard. Twice. A further third sneeze half a minute later. A fourth one at 5 minutes. And another one after that during the theme reprise.

Someone, please hand that lady a tissue.

Usually, this would annoy me and I'll change the track or listen to another version. While it is most definitely a pity that it is forever recorded into an otherwise stunning performance by a great master, the wonder of Isaac Stern's playing is that no matter what distractions there are, it doesn't ruin it, nor does it take anything away from the quality in which he plays. I'm not a big fan of Mozart either- my previous violin teacher knew that and never had me play any of his pieces. I wasn't given a choice and my current teacher's first suggestion was a Mozart violin concerto. Oh well, one can only learn and not complain- here's my chance to figure out why I cannot play a classical piece in all its simplicity. Minimal glissando, minimal flare, play the notes on the page, take note of the timing. Isaac Stern as a reference...

Repeat.

From fooood

Shoes

... the soles of your shoes are all worn down

The time for sleep is now

It's nothing to cry about...

It's no secret that I'm more keen on buying shoes than any other items. Clothes- I recycle through about 3 shirts, 2 jeans, 3 jackets, 1 scarf. Bags- I try not to even bring them around anymore, but I've been carrying only one brown backpack for the past month or so. Shoes? I'm not even going to bother counting. There are different shoes for different occasions. Badminton, running, walking, casual walking, different lengths of boots (thigh high, mid length, ankle), work shoes, comfortable work shoes, formal events, hiking, rainy season, summer season, beach, washing car (that's really just slippers)... you name the occasion, there's probably a pair of shoes especially for it.

From fooood

Choice of Communication; NZ3 FIN

Music or language? 

Or, more specifically, given the choice of knowing how to play every single musical instrument out there, or being fluent in all languages, which will you choose? For me, there's never a doubt in my mind- language. If I were to have any sort of magic, any sort of "superhero" power, it would be to master every single language and dialect out there in the world. A close second will be teleportation, but rather than being able to teleport, wouldn't time warp make much more sense? Then you can freeze time, go to another location, unfreeze time- that's the same effect as teleportation really. 

I digress. Back to languages... One of the components of my job is to aid communication through music, for those who do not or cannot speak or use words. To be able to play every single musical instrument out there and make them sing is a fantastic skill to have- one that I would love to possess, but for someone who can speak, being able to communicate fluently with anyone in the world must be one of the handiest skill to have. What can one do in a place that is completely foreign with no common language at all? I hardly think playing a piece of music on the violin will be able to communicate the question of "where is the closest restroom" to another person... To me, stepping out of my comfort zone is to go to a place where the language is foreign. That's something to do in the future...

From NZ 2014

The Cost of One & NZ2

So recently my dad told me to get life insurance.

Coincidentally, my brother was talking about how he was getting life insurance a couple of days prior to that too. Then there was the news about the MH17 passenger airlines getting shot down, with a devastating death toll of 298. And not forgetting MH370, the missing flight carrying 239 lives that simply vanished. On a smaller and more personal scale, I'm a self-confessed road rager (in my yearbook at the end of my high school, I was given the title "worst driver" of my year, though in my defense, the one and only accident I was involved in was not actually my fault); my field of work is not exactly the safest (being attacked by clients is definitely not unheard of); and I'm a bit too lazy to care very much when it comes to general self-care. Oh?Muscle strain? Stop playing badminton for a week? Yeaaaa maybe.... nah.

Make that very lazy. And head strong. You there, stop nodding please.

On a side note, it will be interesting to find out how much this life is worth to the insurance companies. I was always reminded that I'm an investment which my parents make on a daily basis, and I don't doubt that. In fact, I will never be completely aware of exactly how much investment my parents put into me. Looking at it retrospectively- there's the big stuff, like how they paid for my music tuition fees for years, some of my uni fees, but also the small- every square of toilet paper, every gigabyte of internet, every drop of water etc. Not just money, but time, love and effort... this defiant, stubborn child was never an easy one to take care of. While life insurance (money) can bring little, if any at all, comfort to bereaved ones, it can be considered a responsibility to get it. At this stage for me, it's also a note of thanks for investing in me. In the future, that will change when I have others depending on me, but for now....

New Zealand 2!

From NZ 2014

Shuffling and NZ1

Everyday is like a jigsaw puzzle. With 24 hours, it's a matter of shuffling activities into those 24 hours. I've never really had a problem with time management. Ha. Let's face it- I have massive time management issues, but being someone who works much more efficiently under pressure, ie time or the lack thereof, I always manage to fit what needs to be done into whatever little time I have.

Till today.

I literally couldn't think of any way I could fit everything I want done into 24 hours. What I'm trying to get at here is that perhaps what we all need is a central focus point. Brings back the point of priorities really. What is important? What do I want to be good at? Often, those with savant minds are very focused on being good at one thing. Perhaps it's having an amazing memory, or the talent of drawing, or music, athletic abilities... it is right to challenge ourselves to different things, perhaps even get quite good at them, but we all have one thing that we enjoy or excel in above all other fields.

Someone once told me that when he goes for a passion, he puts 100% investment in it. Time, money, talent, effort, everything. He was lying of course, because it doesn't work practically. Money is essentially what runs our ambitions. If I want to focus on music, I will need the finance to do so, and the only way is by having a job. That takes away time and effort. It's a conundrum that cannot ever be solved satisfactorily.

Unless you are filthy rich. In which case, go live your perfect life and be really good at that one passion. Hopefully it's something that the world needs.

From NZ 2014

That's the end of my rant. Getting back on track, this is New Zealand post number one!

Sentimental Post

So this entry is going to be a quick one. Supposed to be packing for a trip to the snows! Skipped badminton for various reasons...

Random story time:

Yesterday, my dad was handing me a teacup and I saw a drop of red on it. Thinking it's just dirty, I jokingly passed it back to my dad and said, "Look, there's blood on it."

Dad looked surprised and said, "Where did it come from??" while gazing at his hands.

Turns out he had a small cut somewhere. When he told me it was his blood, I exclaimed, "Ew dad, I almost touched it! That's disgusting!"

He gave me the look and said "what do you mean 'disgusting'?? The blood running in your veins is mine too you know."

=__=

Two entries ago, I wrote that I find it hard to find the motivation to exercise after work. Not today. I was actually thinking: I won't be exercising very much for the next week or so, I'll be skipping Sunday and Tuesday's badminton... I really need to go tonight, however... 

Today is also my dad's birthday. We always prioritize things in life. For some, status and career comes first, for others, friends, partners, social life, religion... at my current stage in life, family is definitely in the top 3. There are times when I get exasperated at him simply because I was tired, and I know I shouldn't. When he finds little reasons to pick a fight with me, I know it's because he's finding any reason to interact with me. I'm not home a lot of the time, so he finds every excuse to see me, like insisting on driving me to work sometimes, even if it's an hour's drive away, and letting me sleep in the car for that whole hour anyway.

So today, when I came back home, dad said he left a bag of groceries on the bus today. It was a bag of sweet potatoes and he was lamenting about how he had to pick and choose especially nice ones. Even if it was about $3, he was quite upset about it. I drove to Pishon at Eastwood after work to pick up... a sweet potato cake for him. For this, I skipped badminton.

Thank you dad, and happy 64th! Thanks for bringing me up to be who I am now... hopefully I'm making you proud. 

SNAFU

We learn from mistakes. If we don't ever make them, we won't learn or grow, or become better. The greatest danger is to stay dormant, to stunt our own growth, to lead a terribly uneventful life that does absolutely nothing for yourself and anyone. We are always told to be satisfied, to be content, to treasure what we have and to accept that we cannot have everything. That is wise, especially when it comes to materialistic wants, but it does not apply for everything. I, for one, am not satisfied with my music (therapy) skills and aim to improve. I'm not content with the knowledge that I already have in regards to the world, news, politics, history. I want to know more about cooking and the chemistry behind foods.

Someone once told me that parroting is stupid. By parroting, he meant listening to someone else's opinions or "facts" and "truths", and taking it in as your own. We all need to hunt for the truth ourselves, and develop our own way of thinking. Do as much research on everyone else's differing opinions before forming our own beliefs and truths. 

From cookkk

Why am I talking about mistakes? Because of this. This is a recipe I will use again. Even though I succeeded in making it today, I also failed. Will I make the same mistakes again? You bet I won't, because I'm writing it down here, laying out my mistakes and ironing it for next time.

Venticinque: The joy of Achieving

What makes happiness? We are constantly trying to find that elusive multi-dimensional entity. Back when I was at uni, I took up a philosophy unit on Happiness. First lecture in and the lecturer was already disclaiming that we're not going to be any happier doing this course, nor will it bring us any closer to finding it. Needless to say, I stopped attending lectures but still managed to do rather well.

For me, one of the answers is to work hard towards something and to finally achieve... that sense of accomplishment and gratefulness combined is happiness. Self-entitlement is therefore the antagonistic interference of that kind of happiness. Normalcy, at times, can be happiness too, in which case unexpected events can cause major upsets. There's plenty more, but  nothing beats...

Climbing into bed at the end of a tiring day and burying my entire face into my pillows, indescribable.

From fooood

Back to Saturday after our run.

Ventiquattro: Expectors

No pain no gain.

There are no shortcuts to success.

The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity.

The mind is everything. What you think you become.

Inspirational quotes. They are absolutely everywhere. Some we know and take to heart, others... we know but we choose not to see it. If you are one of those friends that post inspirational quotes on Facebook or social media on a daily basis, I may well have blocked your posts from showing up on my feed. To me, they are in the same classification as "spam", even though, granted, some are actually pretty deep. 

While I won't be caught dead posting spam usually, these quotes are here because it's all related to mind strength. I've often been told that my mind is weak. Note that mind strength is actually quite different from mental endurance. Hiccups in life faze me but I won't sink too deeply into depression, pressure drives me to achieve, and my head is hardened by what is commonly known as stubbornness. Mind strength, to me, is resolution. Commitment. Most noticeably lacking when exercising and during sports. People who know me will know that I play badminton 3 times a week, but they might find it surprising that it's actually really difficult for me to motivate myself enough to go. Every. Single. Time, my mind will be a raging debate between "stuff it all, I'm tired *insert thousand excuses*" and "come on, exercise, play the sport that you love!" The former is often stronger than the latter and would have won if I didn't have friends waiting for me, expecting me to be there. 

Expectations. I hate to disappoint. 

From fooood

How to "Yum Cha"... at home

I've always been interested in reading. Guess it's the way we've been brought up- my sister and brother loves reading too, and ever since I can remember, my mum would take us to the library and pick out some books, take it home and wipe it all over with alcohol rub (because library books are filthy and you never know whose grubby hands handled them before you) before giving it to us. It was exciting to visit the library, quite unlike a lot of kids these days, who probably enjoy watching youtube and jabbing their fingers at touchscreens much more than reading a good old-fashion paperback.

Of course, some books are more interesting than others. For my brother, it's always been contemporary, philosophical, thought-provoking books, which I have learnt to enjoy as well. My sister was into crime fiction, which we all read. Me? I like fantasy, sci-fi... and cookbooks. Recently, I've been reading a lot on how to make food that you get at yum cha (previous entry started it all). After experimenting with mango pancake, I came across a dumpling recipe from Donna Hay's cookbook.

From cookkk

Having made wanton plenty of times before, I had the translucent kind of dumplings in mind- the type that har gao comes in.

Remnants of the Past

We know that everyone we meet has some kind of influence or impact on us that shapes us to be who we are presently. No matter how insignificant a conversation might have been, a passing comment, a smile, a look, a game, chance meetings, everything gets stored in some form or another. Some memories are stronger than others, and I often find myself remember snippets of conversations or experiencing the feeling of deja vu, but the full picture always eludes me. It's terrible, because more likely than not, I will remember the topic of conversation but not the person I had the conversation with.

So, I remember this particular conversation with someone about yum cha, during which I was told the dish where the restaurant owners rake in the most profit. That dish is mango pancake- cheapest to make, sold for the same price as other dishes.

From cookkk

So I made my own. I remember making this ages ago, but filling it with cream and durian. It was absolutely awesome, but unfortunately, I'm not allowed to bring durian home. I had most of the ingredients at hand already, except for one: custard powder. 

Ventitré: Classic Twists

So I haven't had time to do anything recently. Like check out cafes.

Actually, no, that's a lie. I have been to a few cafes, but I am seriously feeling the oddness of whipping out the camera and taking photos of the food and place. Funny, that, because I never used to care so much. Perhaps now I just don't care about different things. In the past, I didn't really care about what people think when I take photos of food, because I've been doing that for years- even before the stereotype came about, of Asians taking photos of their food endlessly. It was my way of documenting moments, knowing that my memory fails me often.

Now I just don't care so much about documenting less important moments. What I ate two days ago is what I define as "less important" because it certainly isn't as important as being present in that moment with my friend concentrating on the conversation at hand. Perhaps if I were alone, I would feel more relaxed about taking photos, but a camera to me now feels like a device that shouldn't be present at dining tables, much like the phone.

That aside, there is certain company which I know wouldn't mind the camera, like my cafe buddies, so unless I'm out with them, I doubt I'll blog about cafes or restaurants. Happens that I was out with the princess recently and visited:

From fooood

Revisiting my Nemesis

As someone who loves baking, cooking, and eating in general, there are a few things I avoid making. Recently, a friend asked me to make pie. My excuse NOT to make pie is that I don't actually have a pie dish. Actually, that's a lie- I have a large glass pie dish, but when you think pies, you think of individual serve small pies, and I don't have the pie tins for those. Truth is, I avoid making pastry dough. Having to rub the cold butter into the flour- annoying and you end up with cold oily fingers. Having to roll out cold dough- confirm aching arms. Smushing (my word) the rolled out dough into the tin/dish- not hard but still annoying trying to get it to fit. Then there's the whole process of blind baking (I have no pie weights), and dealing with shrinking dough (always happens), removing the weights, more baking, filling, bake again.

That whole process is not difficult, but tedious, and it's also a huge waiting game, resting the dough. Worst out of the lot? Puff pastry- because it's waiting and rolling x n number of times. When my first attempt at puff pastry ended in disaster right at the last proofing after 2 days, I went crying (not literally) to my mum and laid that recipe to rest.

From baKEE

Are you the sort of person to give up? Yep. Weighing the pros and cons, to give up or not to give up, I thought, nah it's not worth the effort and time. Then I had time today and decided to try a different sort of puff pastry- one that required less time, though the effort is still pretty much the same.

I ditched Butter =(

The amount of butter I consume confuses people often. Yes, I'm back on the topic of butter because recently at work, my colleagues and students were discussing the use of butter and I had to keep absolutely silent or I risk offending (and/or horrifying) most of them. I felt terribly guilty for not defending butter, but at the same time, butter really didn't have a place among health-conscious people. This time, the age-old question of whether butter should be melted or unmelted didn't even get a chance to come out. This time, it was more the basic question of "should we even HAVE butter".

I don't do food science. I don't know the first thing about polyunsaturated fats, or what good and bad fats are, but I choose to be blatantly ignorant when it comes to butter because even if butter is bad for me, I'll still stick with it through fat and thin. It's like we have this unhealthy relationship which I refuse to get out of, even if it means I have to work extra hard on the badminton courts.

I love baking with butter. Although sometimes it hurts when I have to melt butter (because time doesn't change a person- I still love my butter unmelted), I still like knowing there is butter in my food because no doubt in my mind, it adds so much to the taste of the end product. Then along comes this cheat's sponge cake that tastes so much like the honey castella cake which most kids from Hong Kong would have grown up with:

From baKEE

It's just not fair. How can a cake without butter or oil or any kind of polywhateveritis fat be this good?

Melbourne 5: Finale

Jealousy. The green eyed monster, as coined by Shakespeare in a couple of his works, notably Othello, where Iago says:

Oh, beware, my lord, of jealousy!
It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock
The meat it feeds on.

And this was him metaphorically describing jealousy like a cat playing with mice before eating them.

Then there's envy. I have massive problems telling the difference between "jealousy" (吃醋) and "envy" (妒忌) in any language. I often got picked on for my bad Cantonese and using words wrong. Simply put, envy is wanting what someone else have, while jealousy is fearing what you have will be taken away.

In which case, the term "food envy" is when you see someone else order a dish that you really want, and yours isn't as good. This problem can be solved when you go with good friends who don't mind sharing food with you, because then you can try everything. And that is probably one of the reasons why this Melbourne trip worked so well- because we're all single, we can share food like good friends do. However, sharing food can also be quite intimate too, and just imagine if any of us actually had partners, the jealousy it would cause.

From melblog

Overall, we had a near seamless trip, nothing particularly bad happened, nothing that was upsetting... we did have a few moments where we'd speak crudely of reckless drivers on the roads, or of rude people in petrol kioks, nothing serious at all. Loads more laughter than frowns, especially since we came for the Comedy Fest!

Melbourne 4

So there was a blackout today. With no electricity, it meant no computer, no internet (wifi down), no baking, no movies, nothing! The lack of activity brought about this stifling ennui that seemingly stretched on, and even though it was only for a couple of hours, I got all fidgety, wandering around the house like a ghost and not knowing what to do with myself.

I managed to wash my car though, AND waxed it. Got rid of this big spider spinning its web all over the side door too. Thing is, I got most of that done before the electricity died, and the sense of achievement at having a bright shiny car kicked up the adrenalin in me, so I was literally running up and down the house annoying my mum. She found it rather amusing that I was stuck at home with nothing to do like a hamster in a wheel, but she was definitely feeling the boredom as well. First world problem indeed: what to do when there is no electricity.

Dreading work next week, but let's try to get Melbourne entries out of the way before that happens, or it'll never get done.

From melblog

9am